i have none of these problems...
on nearly any server i go on i seem to always be the first to connect/get in a map, even on american/brazilian/japanese and australian servers, and i don't even have an uber pc anymore
so im not sure what exactly causes all that, but... a loading bottleneck is usually the harddrive and/or fragmentation, so maybe try and defrag tf2 files and if that doesnt work defrag your game drive (which you should do at least once a year anyway)
otherwise, check if your ram isnt being exceeded, though that would also cause massive fps loss, which your not saying much about so i doubt it'd be that
lastly... connection speed ofc, if you have slow upload it cant send the initial info very fast, which means your game wont load the needed stuff until it finally gets a reply.. which could also be the cause of slow loadings
if neither of these seem to be the case... then i dunno
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