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Whatever / Re: Spill Thread?
« on: March 30, 2013, 02:19:38 AM »
I'm sick of pretending to be someone i'm not online and in real life. I think it's about time the real Hotpockets is revealed.
Edit: I may have over exaggerated my original post to make my stuff sound a little more serious than it was just flat out stupid. I'm going to be 95% honest now.
Okay so to begin I've been a gamer my whole life. Little 6 year old Hotpockets running around in CS 1.6 with my dad and sister. I grew up as a nerd trying to be like my dad and had developed minimal social skills. We had a mic but I never used it because of my squeaky voice and getting yelled at. Because of that I tried to mature a lot quicker than I should have and slowly became smarter but didn't really have a proper child hood.
The only social skills I had gotten were from my older neighbor. He was about 5 years older than me. I grew up more violent. Instead of pretending sticks were walking sticks they became guns. Everything was alright up until about 4th grade.
In 4th grade I had been bullied. These kids called me "Tissue Boy" because of my allergies. I was really dumb and I thought about killing myself by jumping in front of a moving car.
Then in 6th grade I got deep into thinking. My grades got lower and my play time got higher. I was not very courageous and I thought I was pathetic and just hated myself. It put me in depression yet again. I then started writing a will sort of note on what I should do with all my things. I became less social and just
Then recently I had a sort of girlfriend. It was really complicated, I liked her. She was desperate. She and her friends were really emo. I helped them out of pity. I was ashamed of her, my friend dates her. She stops talking to me. Made me sad/angry but I was also relieved.
Now all my friends are doing drugs and even dealing them and are trying to get me to do them.
My school is pretty shitty.
I guess you could call me emo but now, i'm taking care of myself and fixing myself to become some level of normal. I'm not always depressed but this was just to get all of my embarrassing stupid low moments out of my system.
Incoming wall of text. Prepare yourself.
A lot of this is probably stupid teenager stuff that I know I shouldn't have worried about but I couldn't help but worry.Edit: I may have over exaggerated my original post to make my stuff sound a little more serious than it was just flat out stupid. I'm going to be 95% honest now.
Okay so to begin I've been a gamer my whole life. Little 6 year old Hotpockets running around in CS 1.6 with my dad and sister. I grew up as a nerd trying to be like my dad and had developed minimal social skills. We had a mic but I never used it because of my squeaky voice and getting yelled at. Because of that I tried to mature a lot quicker than I should have and slowly became smarter but didn't really have a proper child hood.
The only social skills I had gotten were from my older neighbor. He was about 5 years older than me. I grew up more violent. Instead of pretending sticks were walking sticks they became guns. Everything was alright up until about 4th grade.
In 4th grade I had been bullied. These kids called me "Tissue Boy" because of my allergies. I was really dumb and I thought about killing myself by jumping in front of a moving car.
Then in 6th grade I got deep into thinking. My grades got lower and my play time got higher. I was not very courageous and I thought I was pathetic and just hated myself. It put me in depression yet again. I then started writing a will sort of note on what I should do with all my things. I became less social and just
Then recently I had a sort of girlfriend. It was really complicated, I liked her. She was desperate. She and her friends were really emo. I helped them out of pity. I was ashamed of her, my friend dates her. She stops talking to me. Made me sad/angry but I was also relieved.
Now all my friends are doing drugs and even dealing them and are trying to get me to do them.
My school is pretty shitty.
I guess you could call me emo but now, i'm taking care of myself and fixing myself to become some level of normal. I'm not always depressed but this was just to get all of my embarrassing stupid low moments out of my system.